Have you read my previous post on how to deal with a cheater. Perhaps you re-evaluated the relationship and realized it was not worth giving it a second chance. Probably that is why you need to learn about an easy divorce process.
Alternatively, you are not the one who initiated the divorce. Your spouse asked for it probably because you had issues in your marriage.
Whichever way, the decision to end a relationship is both traumatic and painful. For that reason, i have written this article to help you undergo an easy Divorce process. It will also help you deal with the process in a more realistic and sober manner.
How is divorce like?
Worse than going through the grief of a loved one. It simply means giving space for another person to be with your ex-spouse. A person with whom I believe you had children with.
Whether it is as a result of infidelity, adultery, or falling out of love, divorce is very hard to deal with.
Changing status from being married to being single is very traumatic. How do you tell the public that you are no longer a Mrs?
Don’t lose your self-esteem with the feeling that you were never good enough for him. You are not alone. Even happily married couples go through a divorce. Handle the situation well, to avoid doing things that will hurt others such as committing suicide.
How do you inform your family members, friends and above all your own children that you want to have a divorce? The situation may be worse if you are not the one who initiated it.
How long will an Easy Divorce Process take?
Healing does not happen overnight but is a process that takes time. This article explains what to expect after separation. It also contains tips that will help you have an easy Divorce process that will not put you to shame there after.
However, this will involve a lot of perseverance, focusing on your future and taking responsibility of your own actions with integrity.
This process might take up to six months on average to completely heal. However, it also depends with the court process.
1. Denial- First Step to An Easy Divorce Process
It involves failure to accept the situation as it is. Your partner just informed you that he wants a divorce. You haven’t come to terms and you still believe he will change his mind.
For an Easy Divorce process, you must not blame yourself for a failed relationship. The two of you ought to have been committed to the relationship for it to work. He, therefore, is equally to Blame. Don’t feel like you were not good enough for him, but rather know that he was just not good enough for you.
Should You Beg Him Back?
No. Stop that feeling that there is something you could do to get him back. Remember, when he asked you for a divorce, he had already ended the relationship with you. It’s a decision he had made after a long time of thinking.
Begging him back will not be fruitful. The best advice is to accept the situation as it is and move on. You need to come to terms with the situation no matter how much pain you will feel for an easy divorce process.
2. Shock
This is characterized by one’s abnormal behavior. You may lose the desire to groom well, attend to your hair and lose your appetite. Staying alone and crying will be all what you want
This is the most painful and worst stage of life. Generally, you will accept the fact that he is no longer with you and nothing you do or say can bring him back.
Allow yourself to cry as much as you want to. Crying will reduce tension and stress in your heart. You will feel much better after. However, be careful not to cry in front of people as it might create unnecessary attention and gossip
- Interrupted sleep
Most of the nights, you will experience interrupted sleep, thinking about your failed marriage.
Ordinarily, many people lose their appetite for food. However, at this time you ought to eat healthily and exercise regularly. Otherwise, you will lose a lot of noticeable weight.
Sleeping on a bed alone, a thing you were not used to will be traumatizing. There is no doubt you will stay awake for a couple of hours before falling asleep.
- Be strong- secret to an easy divorce process
Perhaps you had invested plenty of time in your marriage and family. Equally, you own property with him. What about having young children with him? If yes, I can assure you that it will not be a walk in the park. You need to stay focussed on your future for quick healing.
There is no doubt, you will be heavy with blame and anger, wanting to spend most of the time thinking about the various events in your marriage. And also what you should have done to prevent divorce.
It may not be an easy divorce process for you.
Regretting and talking about the failures in your marriage will not help you out. Instead it will delay the healing process.
Indeed, if you don’t keep your emotions under control you will often be irritated over very minor issues.
Occasionally you might hope that your marriage could still be saved. On the other hand, you will feel nothing but despair.
3. Bargaining
This a stage where one may want to give it the last trial. You will be tempted to persuade your ex to change his mind for the last time. If he refuses, you will certainly despair.
The fact that you don’t have control over your marriage destiny makes you lose self esteem.This may delay the harsh feelings of divorce.
4. Depression
A feeling of loss of morale to do anything may crop in. Most likely, all your friends will run away because all you will want is to be alone.
If you are not strong enough, you will be depressed or worse still, commit suicide. As a result, you may develop high blood pressure, stroke, and later death. Hang out with your friends and avoid being alone. Alternatively, keep yourself busy with house chores.
- Talk to a Counselor- Best for an Easy Divorce Process
Visit a counselor if you feel depressed. He will guide you throughout your healing process. The secret to quick healing is finding the best person to talk to.
Healing is a long and difficult stage in the divorce process. I know of a lady who became insane and had to retire from work on medical grounds.
All this is not meant to scare you, but rather prepare you for the worst. At the same time, it will give you strength to fight what is ahead of you.
When you are aware of what to expect, your body becomes strong and prepared. You will therefore be able to have an easy divorce process simply because you will be able to face the situation soberly. To avoid sudden outbursts or anger , visit a counselor as i earlier advised.
5. Acceptance
You will enter your final stage where you will have given up on your spouse and let go. This will come after realizing that nothing you say or do can make him change his mind or bring him back to you.
You will stop blaming him of your marriage failures and finally realize that there is life after divorce.
- Life back to normal
Slowly you will start leading a life that is filled with happiness and satisfaction. The stress and blame game will finally be gone.
Unlike before, you will learn to do things on your own and accept the fact that your spouse is no longer with you. Life will slowly go back to normal. It is the beat stage of the divorce process.
Conclusion
An easy divorce process will involve acceptance, focusing on the future, taking responsibility for your actions as well as acting with integrity.
It’s never easy, and as I said earlier on, it takes about one and a half years to leave a normal life after a separation.
Everyone deals with divorce differently, but surprisingly, the stages that people go through are similar.
I have not been through divorce myself, but have interacted with close to seven people who have gone through this process.
- Never rush into marriage
All whom I interacted with, pointed out that the pain is worse on the person who never initiated the divorce.
However, I urge all those people aspiring to get married to take time before settling down with somebody.
Don’t assume your husband-to-be is different from all men then rush into marriage. Take your time to learn him well.
Learn his weaknesses slowly before deciding whether to get married to him.
Don’t be carried away by the love you have for him and rush into marriage and then later regret your decision. Remember, divorce is painful and time-wasting. It can also ruin the life of your kids. However, if it comes, deal with it with a sober mind.
Finally, I hope this article has explored awesome tips for an Easy Divorce Process. You may also want to read my previous post on What do if Your Husband Cheats on You
